Beth's Story: Rare Genetic Condition and IVF
First let me introduce myself. I'm Beth and my husband is Keiran.
We knew IVF with PGD/PGS would be our journey very early on in our relationship, however we didn't realize the roller coaster of emotions we would endure.
My husband has a rare genetic condition called hereditary angioedema. There is a 50/50 chance of us passing it onto our child. All anyone ever wants is a healthy baby, right?
We started our journey by getting all the usual tests, HIV, Hep B&C, chlamydia. We passed them all and then the scary ones...
Semen analysis & uterine scans. The Dr joked, "You 2 are so fertile you need to sit at opposite ends of the settee." We were over the moon, and both sighed with relief.
We went home and thought this will be a piece of cake. Oh, the naivety (eye roll).
I started my first round of STIMS (follicle stimulation) on 12.11.18 I had 18 eggs collected. Nobody warned us about the drop off. I thought I'd have 18 embryos. We ended up with 2 day 5 blastocysts and 2 day 6. Now with normal IVF/ICSI this would usually be when the embryo is transferred, for us we have to get the embryos biopsied and frozen. 4 anxious weeks we are waiting for the results, we had 1 embryo that was genetically normal. I was ecstatic, all I'd been told was, "it only takes one."
We started prep for transfer 16.03.2019 and transferred our beautiful embaby 08.04.2019. We were beyond excited; this WOULD be our baby. We browsed baby stuff, picked out names, and I even bought crafts to make a pregnancy reveal. 29.03.2019 was our OTD (Official Test Day). It was negative.
We were crushed, how could it be?
We're both fertile we have no known issues. They put the embryo right where it should go, I had all the symptoms google said i should have in early pregnancy! The feeling I felt I wouldn't wish on anyone. I fell into a depression and couldn't get out of bed. My husband didn't know what to do and he withdrew, it was torture. We decided to get counselling and as time went on our hearts healed and we became stronger as a couple ready to move onto round 2.
The same process occurred. STIMS then egg collection. This time we had 10 eggs and 3 day 5 blastocysts to biopsy. I felt like we failed before we even started.
Then the results came back and once again we had 1 healthy embryo. I cried and cried. Everyone told me 1 is better than none. I just couldn't shift the feeling of "it's the same as last time, this won't work.' I didn't dare express my feelings because people would think i was ungrateful and selfish. Some people have no embryos to transfer. I pulled myself together, gave myself a kick in the butt, and got ready for my next transfer.
Our 2nd little embaby was implanted 16th October and low and behold, it FAILED.
This was a trigger for my 'pregnancy jealousy'.
People would tell me they were pregnant, and I would Congratulate them do all the stuff you should do, then go in the bathroom to cry. I would see a pregnancy announcement on social media and think, "why can't it be me?"
It wasn't until I recently found this ttc (Trying To Conceive) community that I realized these feelings are OK and are normal for us. No one understands me like these ladies. I can't thank them enough for their support and encouragement. We are all warriors!
It is the 04.02.2020 and I’m 4 days away from my 3rd and final egg collection. To say I am terrified would be an understatement but buried deep inside I have the hope that we all have, that this time, will be our time.
I wish everyone the best of luck on their journey, and although none of us want this to be our road to parenthood, this is the one we were given. So, saddle up and hold on tight for the biggest roller coaster you'll ever ride.
-Beth
Medical Disclaimer:
The information provided in this blog is intended for general informational purposes only and should not be considered as a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your healthcare provider or qualified medical professional with any questions you may have regarding a medical condition. Never disregard professional medical advice or delay in seeking it because of something you have read in this blog.